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VirtualTaboo's Recent Statuses
Sat, 24-Feb-24 1:16 AM (33 days ago)
tip
"Babe is it in?" "Yea." "Does it hurt?" "Uh huh." "Let me put it in slowly." "It still hurts." "Okay, let's try another shoe size."
Mr_Vein, smitten4u and GottaBeMe like this
😂
(14 days ago)
Sat, 3-Jun-23 12:25 AM (299 days ago)
tip
What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?
ZippyMilf likes this
What?
(299 days ago)
Oh I get it…. Cause the puppy got too close…
(14 days ago)
Sat, 24-Dec-22 1:43 AM (1 year ago)
tip
If you jingle my bells, I'll give you a white Christmas.
Snowing like an SOB out there. Im good tongue
(1 year ago)
^^^ not to mention wind gusts up to 110 klm per hour with wind chill factor of -24 celcius
(1 year ago)
juicy likes this
Subtle! 😁
(1 year ago)
Lol. I’ll give em a shake …
(1 year ago)
Your jokes sleigh me
(1 year ago)
Jersey__Girl and lennynatural like this
Sat, 19-Nov-22 9:57 PM (1 year ago)
tip
I’m usually around six inches long, get dripping wet and foamy after a job well done. What am I?
beerdrink
(1 year ago)
Toothbrush
(1 year ago)
A very small car wash
(1 year ago)
MrsTrellis likes this
soap on a rope?
(1 year ago)
Martin Loofah King ?
(1 year ago)
MrsTrellis and Relaxer like this
Sat, 29-Oct-22 2:02 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What did the guy say when he got caught masturbating to an optical illusion?
its just ab illusion,,,uh uh aha
(1 year ago)
Who was he and who caught him?
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
it's not what it looks like
(1 year ago)
i blame it on fake nudes
(1 year ago)
Jersey__Girl likes this
Sun, 9-Oct-22 12:54 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What’s the speed limit of sex?
perfect answer
(1 year ago)
smitten4u likes this
Butt, is a speed limit needed?
(1 year ago)
That is entirely up to the woman involved wink
(1 year ago)
smitten4u and lennynatural like this
It’s 68, but at 69 you have to turn around.
(1 year ago)
smitten4u and Artistic like this
The slower, the better. Any man who exceeds the speed limit isn't for me.
(1 year ago)
Relaxer likes this
Sun, 25-Sep-22 12:15 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What do a vibrator and tofu have in common?
Sun, 18-Sep-22 2:05 AM (1 year ago)
tip
How many kiwis can you eat if your stomach is empty?
I love kiwi,if ripe enough they are yummy
(1 year ago)
ThePadrino likes this
Fine, let's exchange kiwi for kumquat in the original question grin
(1 year ago)
lennynatural likes this
How about hamburgers, can I have hamburgers?
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
Only if you add a condiment or topping that starts with the letter 'k'
(1 year ago)
lennynatural likes this
Kmustard?
(1 year ago)
Fri, 2-Sep-22 1:38 AM (1 year ago)
tip
How do you make a rhinoceros float?
like a lifesavier? yum yum
(1 year ago)
bluebayour6 likes this
a scoop of ice cream, a rhinoceros and root beer?
(1 year ago)
You're gonna need a big glass for that, Happy.
(1 year ago)
urwayhot likes this
You need a wheeled platform, and a willing rhinoceros to stand on it for the length of the parade.
(1 year ago)
bring it on a smaller planet, gravity will decrease there
(1 year ago)
Sun, 28-Aug-22 12:35 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What tastes better than it smells?
Bonus round: what has a bottom at the top?
(1 year ago)
lennynatural likes this
Legs.
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo, Artistic and PApda like this
You guys are too good tonight
(1 year ago)
What gets wetter the more it dries?
(1 year ago)
A towel
(1 year ago)
PApda and lennynatural like this
Fri, 26-Aug-22 3:21 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What’s around six inches long, goes in your mouth, and is more fun if it vibrates?
RightPython895 likes this
Has Trivia night started early? tongue
(1 year ago)
smitten4u and EmuLater like this
Is yours battery operated?
(1 year ago)
A toothbrush. Toothbrushes were invented in Alabama. If they had been invented anywhere else they would have been called teethbrushes. smile
(1 year ago)
Wed, 24-Aug-22 1:15 AM (1 year ago)
tip
I was torn wide open by something huge. Hundreds of men went down on me. They were either yelling or groaning. What am I?
A raisin.....
(1 year ago)
Bismark
(1 year ago)
Sounds like nobody got it right,haha my first thought was boat and then I saw his answer and thought "ahhh that's it"
(1 year ago)
Goddamn autocorrect *noboz
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
A big plate full off spare ribs and a big jug off the finest ale ?
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
Sun, 21-Aug-22 3:47 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What’s the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The color of it when it is removed.
(1 year ago)
Gag reflex? 😂
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo and Ohioman_1979 like this
lol
(1 year ago)
The taste?
(1 year ago)
NicRae, VirtualTaboo and smitten4u like this
They are only interchangeable if being used on someone other than yourself.
(1 year ago)
Sat, 6-Aug-22 1:47 AM (1 year ago)
tip
In order to play with me, you must blow me first...what am i?
Bagpipe
(1 year ago)
A tummy banana.
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
What's a tummy banana ? I was thinking B1 or B2 or both
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
They’re in the same group of foodstuff as beef bayonet and spam javelin
(1 year ago)
mojo75nz and VirtualTaboo like this
Spam javelin 😂😂
(1 year ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
Sat, 2-Jul-22 9:07 PM (1 year ago)
tip
I'm great for protection. You use your fingers to get me off. What am I?
lennynatural likes this
ahhh.. the love gloe.
(1 year ago)
glove
(1 year ago)
Lol I saw glove anyways
(1 year ago)
Ok then! Where is my prize?
(1 year ago)
boogers
(1 year ago)
Sun, 5-Jun-22 12:45 AM (1 year ago)
tip
Is your name summer? Because you'll be coming soon...
Sun, 1-May-22 12:06 AM (1 year ago)
tip
What do you if your partner starts smoking during sex?
lennynatural likes this
Those people are really committed to smoking or bored out of their minds
(1 year ago)
lennynatural likes this
Slow down. I'm obviously going too fast if the friction is making her smoke.
(1 year ago)
Check the oil, Clitty! smile
(1 year ago)
Call the fire brigade
(1 year ago)
Artistic and casstess like this
ya gotta hose her down. grin
(1 year ago)
Sat, 2-Apr-22 10:59 PM (1 year ago)
tip
It goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet. What is it?
Your prize? A pack of Hubba Bubba!
(1 year ago)
coca cola flavour
(1 year ago)
lennynatural likes this
one of those things the dentist sticks in your mouth while he drills into your brain
(1 year ago)
Artistic and Saturnfinger1 like this
spagetti smile
(1 year ago)
Pasta?
(1 year ago)
Fri, 18-Mar-22 12:33 AM (2 years ago)
tip
Food for thought. A genealogist looks up the family tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush.
LOL
(2 years ago)
NewFunToday likes this
Sat, 12-Mar-22 1:15 AM (2 years ago)
tip
Okay, party people in the house, may I have your attention, please?
steelrat60 and gingersnap75 like this
Sure! Whatcha got for us?
(2 years ago)
I'm too poor to pay attention
(2 years ago)
DanajustDana likes this
Lovin', is what I got, I said remember that!
(2 years ago)
DanajustDana likes this
ill take lovin for a 5a
(2 years ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
Fri, 18-Feb-22 11:02 PM (2 years ago)
tip
Having sex in an elevator is wrong, on so many levels. Happy Friday, everyone!
Camel snot
(2 years ago)
criketers arms is a nice drop, bloody expensive but ... real nice and hoppy
(2 years ago)
Will try
(2 years ago)
i dont mind stella artoise [tortoise] when it on special
(2 years ago)
crickerts comes in 3 strengths and the flavor varies with each
(2 years ago)
Fri, 11-Feb-22 3:38 AM (2 years ago)
tip
What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control?
tugking70 likes this
A good trip without kids.......
(2 years ago)
If it's the Catholic birth control methos, you get a mind-blowing experience instead of the cock-blowing one you'd prefer. But with the upside of no wet spot... ;-0
(2 years ago)
'methos'? method...
(2 years ago)
Sun, 30-Jan-22 3:11 AM (2 years ago)
tip
Come on hide your lovers underneath the covers.
Sun, 30-Jan-22 2:24 AM (2 years ago)
tip
What lives in winter, dies in summer, and grows with its root upward?
An icecicle?
(2 years ago)
VirtualTaboo likes this
I misspelled it! LOL
(2 years ago)
smitten4u likes this
It's the thought that counts!
(2 years ago)
DanajustDana likes this
I don't give the cold shoulder to those that are n-ice about it.
(2 years ago)
DanajustDana likes this
Wed, 26-Jan-22 1:40 AM (2 years ago)
tip
I have nuts and I can get sticky but you lick me off anyway. You can have me for breakfast, lunch or dinner. What am I?
rhinostool likes this
Ice cream sundae cone...... Headed to freezer now.........
(2 years ago)
VirtualTaboo and Jersey__Girl like this
Must be hot in no shrinkage zone, Penisville, USA!
(2 years ago)
It's colder than a well digger's ass in klondike here, but sometimes you gotta fight fire with fire.... Or cold with cold.........
(2 years ago)
Heavy Chevy likes this
Show 25 More »
   
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