)Peteflash's Recent Statuses
Last shown: (show another user)
Me too. I live vicariously through NN so it has to stick around for at least maybe 20 more years.
(172 days ago)
Laphroaigh likes this
Mee too, I like all the regular neighbors sharing their sexy pics.
Sun, 5-Nov-23 1:08 AM (172 days ago)
How do you find the blind man at the nudist colony, it's not hard
Sun, 5-Nov-23 1:01 AM (172 days ago)
I recently joined a nudist colony, the few days were the hardest.
splitlick likes this
Sun, 13-Aug-23 2:43 AM (256 days ago)
A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, "Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?" The boyfriend says, "Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again."
Sun, 13-Aug-23 2:38 AM (256 days ago)
I'll admit it, I have a tremendous sex drive. My girlfriend lives 40 miles away.
Relaxer likes this
Sun, 13-Aug-23 2:29 AM (256 days ago)
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
Really perverted is when the bird is dead. 
(256 days ago)
Sun, 13-Aug-23 2:03 AM (256 days ago)
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
Oh, no! You've stolen Emu's joke book!
(256 days ago)
Sun, 2-Jul-23 1:45 AM (298 days ago)
What do boobs and toys have in common? They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
Sun, 2-Jul-23 1:37 AM (298 days ago)
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball!!!
Finding the the sweet spot on the G is key, and just like the thousands of spots on a clit, it will change, trust me
(298 days ago)
Sun, 2-Jul-23 1:31 AM (298 days ago)
What do the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and your in deep shit.
Sun, 2-Jul-23 1:19 AM (298 days ago)
What’s the difference between hungry and horny? Where you stick the cucumber
LOVEXXXPORN likes this
Sun, 2-Jul-23 1:13 AM (298 days ago)
What is the difference between “ooooooh”and “aaaaaaah”? About 3 inches.
LOVEXXXPORN likes this
Sun, 23-Apr-23 2:32 AM (1 year ago)
What do you do when your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down.
Sun, 23-Apr-23 2:29 AM (1 year ago)
What’s better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ.
Sun, 1-Jan-23 2:39 AM (1 year ago)
My New Year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating. But I’ll wait until tomorrow to start.
Tue, 27-Dec-22 2:33 AM (1 year ago)
If facial wrinkles are called laughter lines....then I guess my whole bodies a joke.
If you showed something of your body and not just your dick, we'd know whether to agree or not. Just sayin'.
(1 year ago)
Sun, 11-Sep-22 12:26 AM (1 year ago)
Did you know, if you get pregnant in the Amazon, it’s next day delivery
Sun, 3-Jul-22 2:05 AM (1 year ago)
Question: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common? Answer: A wet nose.
Sun, 19-Jun-22 12:26 AM (1 year ago)
Q: Why is a vagina just like the weather? A: When it's wet, it's time to go inside
Sun, 5-Jun-22 1:21 AM (1 year ago)
A dick has it rough. Not only are his closest friends nuts, but his backdoor neighbor’s an asshole. And if that weren’t enough, he regularly takes a beating
lennynatural likes this