Status Updates - Let Everyone Know How You Feel - NewbieNudes

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Sun, 29-Apr-18 11:49 AM (6 years ago)
tip
2 broken arms and a hard on - typical!
Three stiff limbs then wink
(6 years ago)
MissLizzie likes this
4 I got cramp too!
(6 years ago)
maraff likes this
Ever tried typing with your toes?
(6 years ago)
No, but I ony ever use one finger anyway wink
(6 years ago)
Damn my arse is itching now
(6 years ago)
Itchy bum,money to come,nearer the hole,bigger the sum and no, I ain't scratching it for you.
(6 years ago)
I have to ask though,how did you break 'em?
(6 years ago)
So you got 8 fingers and two thumbs free maraff?
(6 years ago)
Got it in one,matey
(6 years ago)
Thanks, cor that's better!
(6 years ago)
You using dicktation to type?
(6 years ago)
Tripped over the cat, broke through the upstairs bannister rail and down a flight of stairs
(6 years ago)
Normal fee applies...
(6 years ago)
I the cat okay?
(6 years ago)
No Emu the splint sticking out the plaster on me thumb
(6 years ago)
It's still fackin laughing at me maraff
(6 years ago)
maraff and MissLizzie like this
Oh FFS. Could have been much worse and that's your only consolation.
(6 years ago)
I aint mentioned me ankle yet
(6 years ago)
There has to be a joke in there somewhere about getting pussy and seeing stars etc wink
(6 years ago)
So the boot's on the other foot?
(6 years ago)
Hope you've got a bidet?
(6 years ago)
The cat's wearing it Emu
(6 years ago)
Fuck it, someones at the door - is that you maraff?
(6 years ago)
In my Jehovas Witness capacity
(6 years ago)
Bloody hell!
(6 years ago)
Not far off maraff - someone trying to sell me Atheism, said it was a non prophet organisation!
(6 years ago)
Bidet maraff of course, only we call it the kitchen sink
(6 years ago)
It happens religiously when you don't want visitors, don't it? wink
(6 years ago)
EmuLater likes this
As long as you are posh and move the dishes first wink
(6 years ago)
Good thing you didn't have a hard on when you fell or "something else" might be broken. tongue
(6 years ago)
i.e. Pole vaulting
(6 years ago)
Might have saved his arms and ankle though!
(6 years ago)
Depends how desperate the need is
(6 years ago)
^always been needy
(6 years ago)
Not me fist as well Lizzie
(6 years ago)
Seems you were pussy whipped? tongue
(6 years ago)
maraff likes this
Remember Lizzie me arms am out of action
(6 years ago)
Qustion please..Whats it's like to not being able to rub your face ?
(6 years ago)