The "lesser league", my ass! hehehe

Hi, everyone, happy Independence Day and a belated happy Canada Day! I know it's been a looong time since I've written here. Sorry about that, but Real Life has just gotten in the way of NN life. I'm sure you know what that's like. Hope all is well with you guys. I'm doing okay, not liking the heat we're having (yuck!) but looking forward to barbecued ribs tomorrow (yum!).

Take good care, and I'll try to stop by more often from now on.

Hugs,
Sharon

P.S. How 'bout them Angels?!

I just lost my mother at Christmas after a long illness and now I feel like it's happening again with my mother-in-law. D's mom suffered a mini stroke the week before last, and the writing seems to be on the wall for her. This time, though, D and I will be responsible for providing all her care, he doesn't have any siblings to help out. But that's ok, she's a wonderful lady and we're glad to do it.

Because of her declining health and the time D and I will need to provide care for her, we decided to close my website. We simply would not be able to maintain it while taking care of his mom, who might possibly have to move in with us. We stopped accepting memberships and re-bills on April 1, and it will officially close on April 30.

I'll still run the Clips4sale store I started last month because it takes just a fraction of the time to maintain that a traditional website does. But I doubt if I'll ever have a website again, at least not until after my mother-in-law has passed away, as morbid as that sounds. It was fun and all but it sure required more time than I thought it would.

Hope everyone had a happy Easter. Last week we stayed at my sister's house (where my mom used to live) and babysat for her so she and her husband could get away. We took D's mom with us to keep an eye on her. She did real well, thank God. My sister lives in a big beautiful ocean-view home just about a mile from the beach, but we couldn't really enjoy it because it was foggy and gloomy every single day! Our Easter celebration was nice but low-key, it was the first holiday without our mom there.

Anyway, I'm back home playing catch-up and working on updates for my website. It's only right that I continue to update throughout the month since I have members who will be active until April 30. I want to leave everyone with a smile on their face, ya know?

I've missed you all! xoxo

Have you ever had a meal that was absolutely perfect in every way? That's how my lunch was today, sublime perfection from beginning to end. Each course was the most delicious I'd ever eaten, can't imagine any better. D thought I was gonna orgasm right there in my seat from the sounds I was making! lol But OMG that's because it was sooo good.

Still licking my lips and remembering.....

...on DirectTV's NASCAR Hot Pass. It'll take some getting used to watching a race that way, but I think it's pretty cool. Except for one thing - there are commercials! I thought because we're paying for special coverage we wouldn't have to be subjected to those damn commercials that invariably come at the worst time. Wrong!!!

And I thought this year's Daytona 500 was a little boring (although one racer did cross the finish line upside down and on fire *lol*), but maybe I wasn't watching the same race because some of the announcers stated this was the most exciting Daytona 500 ever. Huh?

Haven't had a chance to blog lately but I wanted to stop in and say Happy Valentine's Day to all NN'ers. Hope you're able to spend it with the one you love!

Let's see, what's happened since I last blogged? Well, D and I hosted a Super Bowl party for family and friends. We were SO happy the Colts won! Yaay! During one of the commercials (which overall I thought sucked this year), we went around the room and asked everyone what position they'd want to play if they played football. A number of people said quarterback, some said receiver, my younger son said strong safety. When it came to my turn, I didn't hesitate, I answered middle linebacker.

Why that, of all positions? Easy. You don't have to run that much, it's gotta feel a whole lot better to be the one hitting than the one getting hit, and you get to be in charge of the defense. And I've always liked being in charge! (well, except in bed, I prefer a take-charge partner there *lol*) D said he couldn't picture me as a linebacker, they're really aggressive. Hey, I can be aggressive. Just mess with my family, especially one of my kids, and you'll see aggressive!

Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day, y'all. From now on you can call me Sharon Singletary. Grrrowl!!!

Just noticed that today is D's and my two-year anniversary on NN. Whoopee! When we first joined I remember there were only about 170,000 photos posted and look at it now! Lots and lots of changes have happened, some good, some bad, but overall this is still a great place.

While going through old family photos for my mom’s memorial, I came across this pic of me. It was taken on a water ski camping trip, I must have been 21 or 22 at the time. (Don’t make fun of my hair, I was camping, dammit!) Looking at this photo now, I think “Wow, I had a great little body back then!” But I can remember how I felt about myself when I was that age, the kind of body image I had, and it wasn’t good. I can remember being embarrassed of my body because I thought it was so fat. A lot fatter than most of my friends, anyway, and of course fatter than any model or actress popular at the time (and they were definitely “meatier” then than they are now!). I didn’t see the beauty of my body, I couldn’t get past my Big Belly and Thunder Thighs. I didn’t appreciate that I was strong and healthy, that I had a nice round butt and nice firm DD cup tits and a very feminine nipped-in waist. No, all I saw were my imperfections – and my fat.

Funny, because I’ve gained about a hundred pounds since this photo was taken yet I feel better about myself now than I ever did then. I’ve finally come to accept and appreciate my body and even revel in my very ample curves. I feel sexier and more womanly now than ever before. Is it because of maturity or because of the affirmation I’ve received posting nude pics of myself on the net? Probably both. I’ll admit there are times I wish I could still do some of the more physical things I enjoyed doing when I was slimmer, like water skiing, but I honestly wouldn’t trade my present body or self-esteem for anything. I’m a happy and proud BBW! And if I’d had a daughter, I hope I would’ve been able to pass on those feelings of self-esteem and self-acceptance to her, regardless of her size.

It’s been four weeks since she died, doesn’t seem that long but it is. We had a memorial service and reception for her the weekend before last. It went beautifully and I think it gave my siblings and me a needed sense of closure. I'm still not done grieving, but then I don't think that stops for a very long time, does it?

Anyway, between the grieving and the preparations for the memorial and being sick for a week, I didn’t feel like getting back into NN. But I do now. I know it means having to start answering the 70+ messages I’ve accumulated in my inbox, but that’s okay. I’ve missed my friends here and want to come back. I may never hang around as much as I used to before Christmas but I will still be a part of things, and I’ll try not to be gone so long again.

For all of you who wrote me the past several weeks and never received a response – I’m very sorry. I read your messages and appreciated each and every one of them. Please be patient with me as I slowly but surely catch up.

Someone wrote asking if I still had my website. Yes, of course I do. And I had to keep up with it in spite of what happened Christmas night, but actually that was good since it kept my mind off other things. I just posted a couple of pics here tonight that are from my site, one has already been posted and the other is a future update.

It’s good to be “home.”

This past week has gone by in a blur for me, but things are getting better now. Thanks for everyone's condolences, I really appreciate them - and I really appreciate you. One thing that became clear to me last week was how blessed I am in life, what wonderful friends and neighbors and relatives I have. I can't begin to tell you all the things people have done or have offered to do to help out. Like I said, it made me feel truly blessed.

A very happy New Year to you all.

Hugs,
Sharon

P.S. Yes, I did watch some football today. Can't believe Boise State won with the old Statue of Liberty play. What's next, a team winning the BCS championship game with the Annexation of Puerto Rico? lol