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Ltdan's blog post - Been Soooo Long

Wednesday, June 27, 2018, 12:52:12 AM

I'm baaacckkkk, sort of. So much has happened since the last time I blogged, and NN is not the same. I dont expect anyone to read this which is why it is such a relief.
I'm once again coming off active duty with the Army. Cant believe I have been doing the military thing for 29 years!
Truth be told, I'm scared shitless to go home. I've been living "by myself" for a year and a half and now I'm going to have expectations placed upon me.
As bad as it sounds, I feel like I'm better as a part-time spouse and father...I get so frustrated when I have to do it full-time! I'm not worthy of the family I have now, a beautiful wife and two amazing (my youngest) boys. I only hope I can live up to their expectations.
To add more excitement, I have stopped my meds for my PTSD because I no longer want that crutch...I am stronger than that.
If anyone has read this, thank you, this is my stumbling attempt to pour it out once again...

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Others Have Said:
undisclosedid1	27-Jun-18 1:20:09 First off let me thank you for your service to our Great Country! If it were not for men like you our lives would be vastly different that what we are Blessed to have today. I hesitate to offer advice to something I cant really relate to because I have never experienced the the traumatic things you have witnessed, but I can offer advice in something I have had a lot of experience with, Being a husband and a Father. First thing I want to say is I am sure your Family will be so happy to have you back with them even if you are not feeling like you are ready to jump into that role full time. . Communication is the key to transitioning back to being the Husband and Father you worry you won't be able to be. Let those who love you know how you feel, and let them be there to help you through this. I fear I may sound a bit too preachy, but .... I Myself find prayer helps give me the strength to weather some of life's storms I fear I can't make it through.

MitchandDaisy	27-Jun-18 1:40:50 You're one of the most awesome guys I've known here. Way too hard on yourself though! Enjoy your family, every minute you can. ~ M : )

misssexyshell	27-Jun-18 12:58:00 Just breathe and relax and remember you can always come on here and release some energy ??

lip2lip	27-Jun-18 14:12:17 Just believe in yourself, that half the battle. The rest should drop into place as you go. Just be patient and enjoy life with the family. Watch listen and join in

Artistic	27-Jun-18 15:45:19 a start to let some steam out here its never a shame to seek help if needed that makes you strong you are worthy of your family your kids are worthy of a dad welcome home soldier

juicy	27-Jun-18 20:48:21 I just stopped in to give you a hug. Transitions are never easy.

Ltdan	27-Jun-18 22:55:48 Once again I am amazed by the real people here! Undisclosedid1, tha k you so much. Well said and you were not at all "preachy!" Mitch, you and Daisy are class acts and your words touched me deeply. Miss, I will always be here for a release...lol! Lip2, got it, thanks! Artistic, great advice and deep down I know it...and juicy...you know I love you and live by your words! Thank you all for taking the time. :-)

Be4andAfter	29-Jun-18 0:13:44 Thank you for your service. You got this, you will be fine.

ThePadrino	30-Jun-18 3:18:22 Thank you for all you do, for all of us. For our protection, for our freedom. I admire you for first, taking the steps to deal with your PTSD and secondly for taking a stand to deal with PTSD on your terms. If you ever feel like it's not working though, there is no shame in medication. It's not easy to be a husband or father and then to have to leave them for long periods of time to defend our freedom. All you can do to be the best dad and husband is to try your best. As a member of the armed forces I'm sure you do your best everyday. Again thank you.

Ltdan's blog post - Been Soooo Long

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