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| Monday, March 11, 2019, 8:19:19 PM |
That is the sound my life made this weekend I had a personal life explosion it's probably the best way to put it... it wasn't a total loss of a weekend there was a birthday celebration in there... that was fantastic to be a part of... this girl turned 18... can't believe she's 18 already... Anyway I keep being told that my life is really hard, when other people look in and tell me what they see... I feel this is just the way things are supposed to be.... but for the last few years I have been raising that white flag of enough is enough..... that I don't want to handle anymore.... after this weekend it is very apparent how broken I really am!! I used to be able to handle so much and now I'm at the point where literally I can either toast-and-butter a bagel or speak to someone.... I cannot do both! For somebody who used to own her own business multiple levels of a business... a company... I owned a company and now I can't even butter a bagel and talk at the same time.. I come here to this beautiful NN to escape... maybe like a lot of you too... I think in my "too serious lifestyle" in my real world.... I am not encouraged to be silly... everyone thinks I'm just dumb... but here I can be my silly self.. this is my outlet this is where I avoid all the chaos of my life..... this is where I come to lighten up of the mood of everybody.... make everyone feel better including myself.... If I was not being here on a regular basis I don't think I could continue in a positive way... I think the negative would just drag me down and I would become a bitter so and so... So after this blog of my little tiny rant.... to get it out.... I am looking forward! I am writing more naughty stories... I figure I could publish a book and then wouldn't need to rely on anyone else for money now would I!!! The writing of the stories is going well I've got 20 ideas... one story that's just now in editing that I wrote over the weekend in between all my chaos... another one that I wrote this morning... I just need to edit them now and of course not tell myself they are crap and just get rid of them hahaha.... Maybe even share a few.. Once again thank you for listening to my ramblings... I wish you nothing but absolute amazingness and I send about a million hugs! |
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