Just a couple of poor representations of two of my, and likely everyone else's, favorite ladies.

Those enchanting eyes that have we have seen so often.


And ofcourse those hypnotizing lines


Ladies I do no justice to the beauty you bring to this site.

Dear Mr. Coon,

Let me begin by commending you for surpassing all rational expectation for size. You are without doubt the largest coon I have ever seen. Two of your creative cohorts joined you in raiding my dumpster. The in their own rights were large. You, however, are larger than the two of them combined. So, congratulations on that. You have accomplished quite a feat. I feel I must apologize for your limp but an important lesson had to be taught. While your enormous size and nasty demeanor may spook normal folk, I am not normal folk. I am a rather large man of quality Scotch Irish mountain stock. Your cousins and I have had many glorious encounters over the years, often ending with me lying in the dust laughing as they made their escapes. When you chose to stare me down, I rather enjoyed the contest and left you ample room to retreat, in the wide open lot. When you opted to bow up and advance, I advanced with you. When you chose to charge, I helped you close the gap and punted your 40 lb ass across the parking lot. So, now we both have a limp and hopefully you have learned an important lesson. Despite your immense size, the tall man who barks like a squirrel is not to be attacked!

Fingertips glide gently, along a velvet kiss.
Like waves softly caressing a welcoming shore.
Slowly forward and back as hearts reminisce.
A lover's touch, soft, gentle, wanting nothing more.
Today enough is only this
To touch the one I adore
That one wish
Nothing more

A certain modem has lights that are labled as follows:

Power
Receive
Send
Online
PC

A brief transcript of a call:

Me: On your modem, what lights do you see?

Customer: green

Me: Green?

Customer: yep

Me: What lights are on? What lights are off?

Customer: all of them.

Me: Ok, let's try this a little differently. On the modem, what are the labels associated with the lights you see?

Customer: what do you mean?

Me: Each of the lights has a label. The label tells you the name of the light. Could you please tell me what lights you see?

Customer: I have power, receive, line key, and Internet.

Me: I'm sorry, but your modem doesn't have a line key light or an Internet light. Could you please look at the lables and tell me what lights you see?

Customer: I have power, receive, line key, and Internet.

Me: could you please read the labels and tell me what you see?

Customer: I did.

Me: I do apologize, but no modem supported by our network, including yours, has a link key light, nor do they have lights labled Internet. Could you please read the labels?

Customer: (exasperated sigh) like I told you. I have power, receive, send, online.


This special kind of stupid is why I don't like people.

My lower lip trapped between teeth longing to nibble and pull. A warm tongue can ease the lip's sting, but not its ache to caress subtle flesh, not the need draw you slowly into this warm wanting mouth.
Poor poor lip the unfortunate victim of this mouth's ache to kiss every gentle curve, to nibble every delicate contour, to breathe you in as every heartbeat screams more.

My eyes made soft, as they follow beautiful curves stretching along the horizon, light cascades softly over delicate contours, while setting sun frames this flowing silhouette. If my hands could only reach, if only they could spend forever tracing her beauty. From her base to her summit, from her beginning to her end, a lavish luscious course, each line savored. One delicious sampling after another, over and again. A heart's longing, like the horizon, stretches eternally onward.

Softly delicate wings paint wishes on spring rays. Time stops in the flash of an eye, as irredesent kisses color the sky.

Those tempting lips
A heart does yearn
Fingers tremble
Aching to learn

The world is askew, light fading, slipping slowly from view. The world cannot end, until I see your eyes smile again.