Not a blog for anyone who just ate.


So, I was out playing fetch with Rumble and I happened to notice a pile of poo with little white things in it. Now, I've already picked up poo that has round worm in it. I don't enjoy it, but I've seen it and it's not as shocking as it first was. But this didn't look like roundworm poo. Roundworms are very thin and kinda wave around. Creepy. This was more... small white things, like large pieces of rice. Distinctive of tapeworm. So I go around the yard and pick up pooh, finding a bit more like it. When I'm hanging in the house I look down at one point and see something white on Rumble's bottom. Same small white thing.

Fuck.

I'm at the puppy class and I see one come out of his bottom.

Double fuck.

We're just starting to kick the round worms out, and now I'm terrified my baby has tapeworm.

I've got a job interview tomorrow for Best Buy (they called me back) at 8. I gotta call the vet as soon as possible too. Because if he does have tape worm, I wanna deal with it right away. But I am PRAYING he doesn't. He's finally putting weight on himself, getting some strength, everything. I would give just about anything for my dog to be healthy. *sigh*

Poor newbienudes, between Krik and I you're going to be stuck with puppy blogs for the next ten years xD



Bahahahaha!

There's one guy at work that I've noticed tends to get under my skin. We get along now and then, but ever since I've started trying to work on my attitude (just..trying to be more positive and happier. And it works. I think nicer thoughts about people rather than attacking them in my head, and it helps. I don't feel all that angry as much anymore. At the end of the day I'm tired, but I don't really get... angry), he's been getting less pleasant to be around, because I realize how he's NEVER happy with anything. He always finds SOMETHING to complain about. It's gotten to the point I tend to just block him out or ignore him. Or sometimes I try getting under his skin by being positive.

For example, today he was bitching about how one of the decorators was the midshift, and she wasn't going to help his side at all and nag nag nag. And I quipped in a cheery, happy-with-the-world-let's-all-get-along voice: "I'm sure if you ask her nicely she'll be more than happy to help :3" Not what he wanted to hear.

But in general, I ignore. Except for on one thing.

This guy and I go to the same church together. Now, me starting to go to a church is a big deal. I was pretty damn happy with Paganism, I just didn't like the lack of community (let's be honest, excluding my sister and a soccer mom I knew, most pagans are just strange people that I really don't care to be around). For me to actually want to officially JOIN a religion, that's an even bigger deal. I was proud of my lack of religion. And the biggest reason for my willingness to join is because of the priest and deacons at the church. They're all such warm and welcoming people. They don't judge (at least not that I've noticed), and they're just damn NICE people. And Father in particular is an amazingly hard worker.

Every time this guy at work starts bitching about Father, it really gets to me, and while I don't go right down his throat in anger, I'm not as friendly or perky as my usual. Today he started complaining about how Father "takes too many vacations." I just freeze on the spot and turn at look at him in shock and ask him:

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah! He takes too many vacations! He's got it so easy!"

"Excuse me? He hasn't had a vacation in forever!"

"February!"

Ffs... six damn months between a vacation and that's TOO MANY?!

And then he really gets into how easy Father has it, what an easy job it is. He gets two days off a week, yadda yadda. And I point out that so do we. Well apparently this guy's days off just aren't as good as Father's and therefore don't count. And what's more, Father does NOT have it easy. He works from early in the morning until very late at night, and on Thursday(a supposed day off) he's got wedding practices, and then on Friday he's got weddings most of the day.

I told the guy at work all of that, and then he blinks and turns to look at me and asks: "Oh? And how do YOU know that?"

"Because I talk to him!"

"When?"

"After church. We have chats."

Ffs >.< Everyday after mass, Father stays behinds to talk with people and accept hugs, so every day after mass mom and I give him a hug and we chat for a while, and considering the fact he and mom both work killer hours, they discus that. So this guy at work gets really quiet, and then he states:

"Well, I've never really gotten to know him like that. I've never introduced myself." As if that's a perfectly good excuse for attempting to bad mouth him.

Usually, I don't think this would bother me. But for me to actually get into a church, I respect Father a lot. And I won't stand by and listen to this guy who's never happy with anything just stand around and bitch and moan about someone he's never even bothered to get to know.

I feel unusually empowered. Something about sticking to what I feel is right, I dunno, it left me feeling a lot prouder. I've been dealing with this man for eight years, going through all sorts of emotional ups and downs with him, and suddenly to take that necessary step back and say: Yeah, he is an asshole, and yeah, he really DOESN'T give a fuck about me. It doesn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it would. To be able to put the space between he and I enough to say: fuck what YOU believe and what YOU want, I'm doing what feels right to ME. It's amazing. And ever since my days have been better. I feel happier, I don't allow myself to really stay angry, I try to smile more, and it helps. And I feel a much more powerful person because of it.

I'm looking forward to the new tattoo in November. A real chance to remind myself how THIS feels. To not be so shy and dainty and uncertain, to listen to my gut instinct and to know not to let myself get pushed around like that again. :3

Didn't dream about scary demon stuff last night, and if I did I don't remember. Dad suggested saying a prayer before I went to bed, and I did so. Whether it helped or not I don't know, but lack of scary dreams was nice =)

I went to bed around 10:30 and wasn't woken up by Rumble until 4. Very nice. Usually he wakes me at 12. So it was wicked nice to sleep in and I was just all praise and happiness toward him. I let him out around 5 when mom and dad got up, and then when I got out of bed around 7, I walked out to find that he'd taken a pad from my bathroom and torn it to shreds all over the carpet. So I clean it up and then dad mentions that he took another one out of there this morning and tore that up too. And while I apologized, part of me was thinking: "Okay, if he'd already torn one up in the living room, and you KNEW for a fact he got it from my bathroom, and you went so far as to clean it up, why didn't you go even further, and close the bathroom door?"


In other news. Used to watch Degrassi The Next Generation as a Kid and they've got commercials for it all up right now, some new big 'LOCKDOWN! OMG!' thing that's happening. But I realized I don't recognize ANYONE in the commercials except one of the teachers. And I hate how overly dramatic the show's become. It was great when it dealt with normal, logical issues. Internet stalkers, eating disorders, friendship, the occasional dramatic thing like school shootings, drugs. Etc. Around the time one of the main characters died though, I lost interest. I understood that logic of it, but he was one of the main reasons I watched the show, and I just lost interest. But now, god, the way they dress is just over the top for their age, the way they act, it looks ridiculous. I just miss the old shows D:

So... usually I'm not the first person to say 'omg it was ghosts!' or 'omg it's demons!' Like they're active and real. But these past few days, I'm kinda starting to get creeped out.

Ever since I started RCIA things have been getting weird. RCIA is basically classes for people interested in becoming Catholic. We spend a few months just asking questions, learning the ideas and theories of Catholicism and decide if we actually wanna join the religion or not, then we learn a lot of the real rules and go through all the procedures, etc.

Anyway! Ever since I started, I've been having a LOT of creepy dreams, about demons and whatnot. Now. My logical side points out that a lot of the dreams correlate to things in everyday life. Nothing I see is particularly new. The combination of things, yes, but nothing specifically stands out as...new to me. For example, since Ash and I have restarted working on the demon comic to make it a proper and scarier comic and to make it a novel as well, I drew a new picture for Beelzebub (and I'm so proud of it, I will absolutely post it later). Anyway, my logic says: of course you're dreaming about demons and creepy things, you think about them a lot during the day now because of going to RCIA, because of the comic. And I saw the picture of Beelzebub in my dream last night an interacted with it.

Logic.

But about four nights in a row of creepy demon dreams is a little odd, and they didn't start with the decision to continue the demon project (something we decided on almost a week or more ago), they started the night of RCIA.

And then dad and I are watching Paranormal Activity and there's the part in the movie where Katie's possessed and says in that creepy double voice "I think we'll be okay now," when she's all possessed and does the freaky smile. Well Filo wakes up from her nap at the point and randomly starts growling and staring at the tv, and she's NEVER EVER done this before lmao

Logic: the bass of the tv woke her and bothered her.

But my illogical side: OMG TOO MANY FREAKY COINCIDENCES

lmfao!

I'm really not freaked out enough yet to actually be concerned. A small part of me is a bit miffed at the coincidences, but really, that's all they are. Coincidences. Really funny and amazingly timed ones.

Augh, all out of NOWHERE Rumble's started peeing in the house. Maybe I haven't been noticing it. I mean, he does have the occasional understandable accident (I leave him out when I leave home and he has no supervision, bound to happen). But today he's just urinated 3 times, one being OPENLY obvious, where I sat down on the couch, he wandered a few feet off, spread his back legs, and just went, and I snapped at him and raced for him, then put him outside, but he wouldn't go.

Now's he's curled up sleeping.

I just don't get it. He was doing SO good, I mean, he's so good that if he's in bed with me he will crawl up to me and fuss at me until I'm awake so he can go out, and if he's on the floor he'll scratch the door. An angel! But when he's in the livingroom and the back door's open, he just pees on the carpet? I know that he's only about 3 months old, maybe I'm expecting way too much for a 3 monther, but still... he was doing SO goooood D:

Rumble went to his first one yesterday. I've been a little shy of going to this place, but it was either there or Petsmart. And Petsmart basically offered a class once a month, which seems entirely useless compared to PetsBehave, which offered one every week. I was shy of PetsBehave because of the 130 dollars it would cost for 6 classes. I mean... that's a lot of money for me right now o_< But I also know that while Filo was easy to train, she's got her problems, and I've already noticed how mischievous this damn boxer likes to be. Besides, I'm a raging crusader for early socialization in dogs, I've seen what it's done to Noel and Filo to no have any, and wont have that happen to mine.

So we go to class and there's one old couple there with this beautiful little puppy, some sort of shepherd but I can't remember what kinda, but Christ is so gorgeous! And then we've got a lady with a border collie that first thing is does is just bark bark bark bark bark BARK BARK bark bark BARK BARK BARK BARK HOWL BARK bark bark just on and on, and I'm thinking 'oh god, a whole class of barking, yelling, yappy puppies. Why am I paying 130 dollars for this? Well one of the trainers comes over right away and starts instructing her as to what the owner needs to do to stop the barking, and the owner just looks shocked and says:

"But the people at petsmart told me to just ignore it and not to reward her behavior with my attention."

"Well if you do that then what's going to happen is she's going to keep barking because since you're not doing anything, she'll think it's an okay response."

So she guides the lady through it and then sets up some extend-able gates around the woman and puts a blanket over it, and eventually the dog quiets down because now all it can see is its mistress. Well, the trainer explains that the dogs reward for seeing what's going on outside of the gate is to be quiet. And omg, it worked! And I was just in heaven suddenly~

We had a pretty fully class, one lady with a very shy and SO fucking adorable long-haired dachshund. All the dogs are kinda checking each other out, but we've all got our own personal seats spread out along the floor, and one of the instructors is mentioning dogs doing breed characteristic things. Like all the herders are trying to herd, one dog is doing this, another is doing that, etc. But I realize I have the only working dog in the class lmao, and the instructor stops and looks right at Rumble, who's in the middle of punching this couple's dog, and she says: "And then we've got the Boxer who just wants to know when we can start wrestling!"



So the instructors introduced themselves and discussed their experience and then we started off the class by touching our dogs and getting them used to being poked and prodded, looking in their ears, pretending to clip their nails, checking their mouths. Rumble took it fairly once he figured out what I was doing. I think it helps that I always grab his paws anyway and feel them, I check in his mouth now and then for fun, and because of the worms I'm almost constantly checking his anus to make sure nothing stuck and that nothing has to be pulled out, because there's been a time or two when he's not-quite-finished with business but doesn't seem to realize it.

Then we were introduced to the clicker, how to use it, and started working on getting our dog's attention. Then we taught them how to sit, not hard to do since most trainers had already gotten started on that. Then we worked on 'down.' After that we took a potty break outside. Well, on my way out it turns out there was a giant ant pile beside the door that I conveniently stepped in, didn't notice until I was standing a few feet away and my right foot gets all bitten up by these ants in my shoes. Ffs... x.x

Well we separated the omg let's go biatch! dogs from the really shy ones and then we let them have a period of time where they're off the leash and playing. We did it very calmly so it wouldn't be a mad house, we made them sit first and then we took it off and said 'ok, go play!' Well right off Rumble finds the bigger pile of shit he can and goes to check it out, so while the instructor's discussing rules of playtime I see his mouth open and I just snap "LEAVE IT!" And the instructor blinks at me and then at Rumble and says: "No, no. It's okay. Let them play, they're fine." Because another dog was with him. And I'm feeling awkward cus everyone's staring at me now, and I point and say: "No... the poo..."

"Oh! There's poo!" And she runs to get a pooper scooper.

So the dogs get to have play time and Rumble just about fell in love with the border collie. She's running around and he gets to chase her, and its the first time a dog's ever been faster than him. And there's dogs letting him beat them up and some of them are even bopping him back. He was in fucking heaven. Then we had to get them all back on their leashes and everyone's okay with it, except Rumble and the Border Collie are still playing chase together, so we're trying to get them, but we're not supposed to 'chase' our dogs, or they think its a game and keep running from us. Well we eventually get them back on and then let them have another off the leash moment, and its easier to get Rumble back on this time.

All around, very good class. I thoroughly enjoyed it and am already wicked excited about going back. If this trend of good classes keeps up I'll prolly go ahead and shell out 130 dollars for the beginners, intermediate, advanced, and even agility, because I think Rumble would love the agility training.

It was the perfect morning. It was rainy and gray outside. Mom and dad had to be up early, and they let the dogs run loose, and Rumble got to run loose with them. Well, whenever Filo's awake early but still tired, she runs into my room and snuggles up in bed with me. Filo is the BEST snuggle dog. I love it. So she snuggled with me, and we fell on asleep. I woke up around 6:30 to Rumble terrorizing Noel, so I shrugged on a button up shirt (which kinda defeated the point of me wanting to cover my breasts, though who from I'm not sure, I was home alone) and gave him the angry voice and he stopped. I went back to bed, and then heard him ruffling through my garbage in my bathroom, and got up and grumbled and snatched the toilet paper roll from his mouth and bopped him on the nose with it, and then swaggered off to bed again.

A bored boxer is a mischievous boxer, as I'm learning.

Well I finally woke up around 7:30 and went to the local cafe for breakfast. Usually I'm gone anywhere from 30 minutest to two hours, depending on how into my book I am. I figured I'd let the dogs stay loose, where usually I put at least Rumble in his crate. Wellies, I asked them nicely to please don't fuck this up, I'm trusting them to behave and not destroy anything.

I invited mom and dad to breakfast when they were out of church, we met up, had breakfast, and then went home. I got there before them to discover Rumble had somehow gotten the door to the bathroom open and very kindly taken all the trash out of the garbage for me, and then he'd put a few of my socks by the front door (so I'd have them if I decided to go somewhere of course), and then toppled my favorite lamp over (this beautiful one mom and dad got me for Christmas, with all these lovely angels on it).

Le sigh.

I got it cleaned up before the parents got home, but I was busted. He left his signature pee in the bathroom. Signature, in the fact that he'll make a big ol' puddle, and then (as if thinking he's done) start to walk away, trailing pee after him as he continues to thoughtlessly relieve himself, and then as if realizing 'oops! not done!' he'll stop again.

It's kinda hard blaming pee spots on the other dogs when mine is the only one that does that .____.

In other news, finished my third book in the past week. I really enjoyed that one, but the ending was disappointing in the fact that most reviews for the sequel books revealed that the second was done by another author who fucked it up, and then the third book ended up not living up to the first and also ended up not following the canon set in place by the first book. It's a bummer, because the first book left off at such a good point.

Couldn't resist. I've been playing paparazzi but resisting the urge to just throw it all up on this blog xD So I've found a very few select photos that I just gotta share :3


At 7 Weeks







At 9 Weeks

Red rocket! Red rocket!






At 10 Weeks

Head tilt, head tilt. He does this so often!!


Playing with Filo