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once you get to know me i am fun to be around, but i am shy at first. i have a good ear and do not repeat what i am told in confidence.
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| Monday, October 15, 2007, 12:07:16 AM- Horsie Ride | ||||||
Little Johnny was passing his parents' bedroom in the middle of the night, in search of a glass of water. Hearing a lot of moaning and thumping, he peeked in and caught his folks in The Act. Before his dad could even react, Little Johnny exclaimed, "Oh, boy! Horsie ride! Daddy, can I ride on your back?" Relieved that Johnny was not asking more uncomfortable questions, and seeing the opportunity not to break his stride, Daddy agreed. Johnny hopped on and Daddy started going to town. Pretty soon Mommy started moaning and gasping. Johnny cried out, "Hang on tight, Daddy! This is the part where me and the milkman usually get bucked off!" | ||||||
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| Sunday, October 14, 2007, 11:59:47 PM- A Good Night Out | ||
Three women walking down the street are stopped by a man doing a survey. He asks, "Ladies, would you mind telling me how you know if you've had a good night out?" The first replies, "I come home, get into bed and if I lay there and tingle all over, I know that I had a good night." The second one replies, "I come home, have a shower and a glass of wine, get into bed, and if I tingle all over, I know it was a good night." The third one turns around and says, "If I get home, rip off me knickers, throw them against the wall, and they stick, then I know it was a good night!" | ||
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| Sunday, October 14, 2007, 1:13:13 PM- Perfume | ||||||
Two blonde girls walk into a department store. They walk up to the perfume counter and pick up a sample bottle. Nancy sprays it on her wrist and smells it, ‘That's quite nice, don't you think, Kathy?’ Kathy takes a sniff and replies, ‘That is nice. What's it called?’ ‘Viens a moi,’ replies Nancy. ‘Viens a moi? What the heck does that mean?’ At this stage the assistant offers some help. ‘Viens a moi, ladies, means 'come to me' in French.’ Nancy takes another sniff, then offers her arm to Kathy again, and remarks, ‘That doesn't smell like come to me. Does that smell like come to you?’ | ||||||
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| Sunday, October 14, 2007, 1:07:23 PM- after reading computer manuals, i've decided that......... | ||
Reading computer manuals without the hardware is as frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software. | ||
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| Sunday, October 14, 2007, 12:01:06 PM- great t-shirt | ||
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| Sunday, October 14, 2007, 11:54:52 AM- Fairy Tale: | ||
One day, long, long ago, there was this woman who surprisingly, did not whine, nag or bitch........ But this was a long time ago..... and it was just ONE day. The End | ||
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| Saturday, October 13, 2007, 9:59:40 PM- i love this pic | ||
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| Saturday, October 13, 2007, 9:49:31 PM- As you get older three things happen........... | ||||||
The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two | ||||||
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| Saturday, October 13, 2007, 9:43:47 PM- Don't try to confuse the class | ||
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face." "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty." | ||
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| Saturday, October 13, 2007, 12:44:16 PM- The Mark | ||||||
When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead. | ||||||
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