I have bought a different place and will be moving.

I hate to give up my family home however the bank does not want to motify my existing mortgage so I have no choice but to let them have it.

Things always work out. If it is ment to be it will be.

I will be closing down the internet till after I get moved to my new place. It will be a couple months till I will be back on line.

Bye for now. Bernie

Finally everything is coming up roses for me lately. I got my disability started and my bankruptcy done with and now I am working on home modification. However I do not hold out too much hope it will work. I am getting some things done between severe back aches and other pains of old age setting in on me.

I will just buy another smaller place and just move and let the blood sucking bank have this one. This house just cost to much to maintain and heat. So I am looking forward to getting everything done and on with life.

I really should just sell everything I can and move to another state. I am so tired of all the rain and cold weather, but I am not to fond of all the storms in the other states either.

Well enough for now I will sign off..

Everyone have a great time.

I found out yesterday that my birth certificate that was issued to my parents in Frankfort Germany, must be replaced because my mother sometime in the past laminated it to keep it from falling to pieces.

Well I was awarded my disability, however I had to present my birth certificate and when they saw it was laminated the guy behind the glass said he could not accept it and I would have to get a new one.. There is a catch it cannot be a copy unless it is certified by the secretary of state.

I tried calling the their office several times but all I get is a recording to leave a message, that I did, however still no call back. Go figure our expensive lazy government can not even answer the damn telephone, or return your call after they requested you leave a message and they will call you back..

So now I have to send a notorized request along with notorized copy of my drivers license to the Secretary Of State in Washington DC. along with 50 bucks and then wait till who know how long for them to get around to finding my document in the archives and send me a certified copy.

It always seems there is a catch to everything one tries to get done when it comes the the over regulated, beuracratic bone heads that run our Government.

Well thats what is happening in my life.

I hope all is going well in yours.

I wish all a very happy week.

Bernie

It has been a very long time since I blogged..

Well things are still rough for me but getting better.
I am no longer driving truck.. I found out that the road was what was making me sick and making my situation worst..
I am now trying to get everything sorted out and moving forward.

Next month I will begin to sell all my crap I have collected over the years and work toward a new beginning..

I have made many mistakes in my life and many I wish I could do over too try and make them right, however that is not possible so I just have to move on and not dwell on them and hopefully learn by them..

To all I have hurt.. I hope they can find it in their heart to forgive me.

I would like to blog more, but right know I will stop for now..

I hope everyone a wonderful Christmas and a very prosperous New Year..

Bernie

I am still struggling to get things right side up..

Just do not know which way to turn anymore, I cannot figure out any options that will help..

I am still stuck driving this stupid company truck and not making any money.. I feel it is all just one big waste of time and effort..

Some times I just feel like running away and starting anew some where else, however I know trouble and misfortune will follow me no matter where I run.

My life just sucks I guess it always had I just did not ever let it bother me because I always could figure out an option or something to get around the hurdle, but not at present I am getting too old to fight it any more, and I guess too old to really care..

I just have to let fate take its course and what ever happens, happens.. That hangmans noose is looking more inviting all the time.. I hate to think this way I hate how it seems it is my only option.. But this dark cloud just keeps hanging over my head and it just keeps getting darker and I just get more and more depressed..

I keep thinking just give it more time another month and things will somehow turn around.. I am getting tired of waiting, hopeing and trying..

So I am signing off.. Good bye world!! Bernie

It seems everytime I start to climb out of my financial hole I fall back in, damn my life sucks......... Will this shit ever end and will I ever have some over due good luck.... Bernie

It is saturday 1-15-11..

I am sitting here along the coast highway 101 over looking the ocean.. It is a sunny warm calm day and I have to sit here for my 10 hour break, I could sure think of and have sat in worst places for sure.

I delivered some bales of packaged wood chips to a horse farm this morning in the country near a town called Santa Ynez,Ca. It is about 30 miles north of Santa Barbara,Ca. It was sure a nice ranch with beautiful horses and colts. along with a heard of floppy eared goats..

Goats are so funny to look at and watch. I always liked goats from my earliest child hood back on our farm, where we had over 40 head of milk goats that we sold goats milk and cheese.. Well anyway..

I have to pick up a load out of Proctor and Gamble in Oxnard,Ca this evening going to Las Vegas,Nv for early Monday morning.. It is not much miles but at least it keeps me moving and makeing some money..

Freight has been really slow lately and now that I am out on the road full time I need to make all the money I can to try and keep the mortgage and other bills paid, been real tough, I seem to always manage to squeek by with the smallest of margins and nothing much left in the bank , some days I have to go with out eating just to make ends meet.I am loosing a bunch of weight.LOL.

Oh well what the Hell I have to count my blessings at least I do have a job.. I am more fortunate than a lot of people right now..

I had to cancel my house phones and internet service so I could save that money..

I have been putting off fileing for bankruptcy thought I might beable to get by with out it , however it looks like I will have to file any way, So I found an attorney that will take payments since I cannot seem to save the $2400.00 most want..

Well anyway enough of that.. I just wanted to blog some and get it off my mind..

One thing for sure working for the Orange Army (Schneider National) That is what we call it because our trucks and trailers are all orange.. LOL..

Working for this bunch is a real pain in the you know where, we run under computerized log books and load booking and if you have not ever been driven or had your life run by a computer it treats you like a robot, it has no concideration or thought about the human element.. I does not concider any variables like one has to eat,take a piss or crap break or anything else humans need to do during the day.. Damn slave driver for sure..

I am not sure how much longer I can stand to work here before I either have a heartattack or a total mental breakdown..LOL..

I will go for as long as I can and keep my eyes and ears open for another job or business to get into..

Well I hope everyone is doing well, Thanks for reading my blog.. Bernie

Well I am spending Newyears night here in Coachella, California.. Have to be in Phoenix, Az in the morning to drop and hook... ( that means trade a full trailer for an empty one).. Then go across town on Sunday trade the empty one for a full one , and head for Clackamas, Oregon to deliver Wendsday morning, then probably head home for a day or so then hopefully I can get started back to full time over the road again..

I am hopeing that this new year will be better than the old one was.. I know it will still be hard and financialy challenging, however I must keep hope alive and do my best to make it happen..

Well I wish all you in the world happy new year.. B

I am in Las Vegas, Nevada. Been back on the road for about 6 days now, been so far this week running pretty hard, so hopefully it keeps up I really need the money..

I have never worked so hard and made so little in my life..

Been barely able to pay my mortgage and other bills.. Collection companies have been hounding me like I can somehow create money like the Government does..

My credit is shot to shit anyway even if I do somehow able to pay them, I really at this time have no choice..

I keep hopeing that things will get better this next coming year, but till I can see some good signs that is happening, all I can do is hope and keep ploding along the best I can..

I need to start selling some of my stuff , but when do I have the time to do that! When I am always on the road trying to make a living..

Most of my stuff, I should say all the stuff that I could sell needs money to get it ready for sale and then I would have to advertise which takes more money, so that idea is pretty much out of the question at this time..

If this dark cloud of misfortune will ever leave me so I can have some good things happen to me for a change. I might beable to get myself going good again.. I just get so damn tired of it all..

B

Just hope everyone had a nice Christmas.. B