The tune again or not, I am not a dumb ass honest... [url]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PG3hBCrgRJU[/url] the moment of truth if I fook up, I will stand in the corner with my dunces hat on......

hello gang,

I have been trying for so long to upload some pictures for you but it was taking yonks and yonks. So much so I have now become exasperated with reading the comment 'upload in progress' I see it when I close my eyes and five minutes later still no change, so off I go in disgust to shower and fill my face. Maybe it is that time of day and people want to show us all what fun they had last night/today (lucky sods)!! So I gave up for now, although I might give it just one last try, dont know whyI bothered!! ((

I have been keeping in touch via blogs with those on the dark side of the planet who I am interested in and I hope to find them when I get up at stupid o'clock every morning to catch up. Dam time zones, I really miss rather a few of you and you have to know that, I do think of you away from here and big hugs for..Adam, for J the toughbitch, for mother earth, L, Lil Bunz, Elle, BBJ, AK, Ratta, Angel, Sexy, Foxilady, the list of girls as friends as allies, who are special to me, well the list is endless. I am so blessed to have you girls. If I forgot you, apologies and all my chaps in Aussie, NZ and the States. Not forgetting the UK posse!! You guys and most certainly people I have forgotten I have to thank you all for the past few days, I am indeed so blessed to have you care so much thank you so much you guys I will post tomorrow takecare all hugs to each and everyone xoxoxo

Hello gang,

I know its been sometime since I have made my presences known and I have a good excuse too.....You recall I had this infection back in febuary and no one could tell me what it was?? Well it never actually left me, it stayed in my legs for ages, I rather foolishly went back to work but far too early, I thought I was clear of it, but this nasty thing then travelled back up through my body again but internally, it settled in my chest, stayed in my heart for about a month caused havoc, then moved and stayed in my hands and arms. It was rather debilitating to say the least. It was also a very terrifying experience and still despite four separate blood tests, seeing six doctors not one could tell me definitively what I was enduring why I was itching so much, peeing so much at night, feeling so pissed off all the time. So I did my own research the thing that kept popping up was this 'staphylococcus' bug, what a nasty, but very clever little blighter!! I am not totally sure but I then discussed what I had found with a micro biologist friend I know (he actually got a nasty leg infection as a younger chap found no answers from any medical professional so decide to find out himself, hence a qualified micro biologist now) He agreed with me that this organism was most probably the culprit. I feel totally let down by my own medical service too, I think they thought I was delusional until I mentioned it to the last doctor I saw and she concurred to a degree with my hypothetical cause but still I have not had a decisive answer I dont suppose I ever will really know. It taught me a great deal though, about myself, my friends and my life. things are much more positive in my world, although sadly the dynamics with one or two friendships have changed, I have to remember while I was an addict life kinda stood still for me, while everyone else continued to live to move on, I just got left behind and I completely understand. My whole ethos towards what I put into my body and how I live my life, what I want from the rest of it has changed so much, partly down to being completely free of my former life as an addict my eyes are very much wide open, I regret the money,but money isnt everything, its the years of time I wasted walking that path I regret time I will never get back, but I have to take something positive from it, it cant be a total waste, so my plan now is to get to college, start that long dream I have had to work with troubled kids off to a start, in the hope my life experiences can make a difference to someone and be of help, if I can prevent just one person from travelling down the same path I did I shall be content. I am also on a massive health drive too, my whole diet has changed, I take so many vitamins, supplements everyday, I eat foods that will help my body to be strong, stay strong help it to recover from this long battle with the little critter. Also, the big thing for me is I am so close to stopping smoking too, I just think its time to give this old vessel a break and prolong my life somewhat be free of any unnecessary drugs in my system.

I have to say, I was so totally emotionally overwhelmed with all the caring messages I have received from you all, I am trying to get round to responding but I am not the quickest or accurate typist (I think my typos are legendary now)!! lol )

I want to sincerely thank each and everyone of you for all your support one way or another, I feel rather humble I am indeed blessed to have so many who care about me, I need to do some blog reading to catch up with you all. I only have one problem.... I gained an extra two stone in weight whilst with this thing, so I am slightly more curvy now, not the skinny minny anymore, but I still have plenty skinny minny pics for you, then perhaps when I have finished posting all of that series then there ought to be slightly less of me for a new set of picture taking.

I am looking forward to catching up with you all I have most certainly missed a great many of you and I am so happy to see my favourite girls and boys are still here playing, takecare people you superstars xoxoxoxo

You should know Flunk are one of my fav bands and I am not in love, with life yes, hope you like.... [url]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC-HFtfkk84[/url] and the lyric's should you need them.... [url]http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Skysong-lyrics-Flunk/123A0AF4360883C248256FF30006FBB5[/url] HUGS my friends xxoxoxoxo

Its totally lost its vibe, Glastonbury, got to big, too commercial, too expensive and is now full of spolite rich kids playing at being a weekend hippy, before they go back to their highflying bank jobs in the city to help screw us some more..Off my soap box for now GRRRRRRRRR xoxoo

hey peeps,


I used to go to Glastonbury for years, from the late 80's til mid/late 90's but only when they had the 'free fields', where all the traveling hippys would hook up, in their homes on wheels, whatever that maybe, old trucks, buses, ambalnaces etc.....Then they stopped that, mainly because the travellers were always reluctant to leave, then once they stopped them from going, the whole festival change for me, but I have found some stuff about it you might like to read (must admit, in all the years I went, it never rained, the opposist in fact far too hot) So is some news coverage of this years event.. [url]http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/gallery/2011/jun/22/glastonbury-festival-pictures[/url] Also, here is someones rather funny story of Glastonbury past, be warned, its rather long... [url]http://chair-craig.vaguerants.org.uk/06.html[url] I kinda miss all the free festivals and the illegal warehouse raves, dance parties....Oh those were the days cramed into the back of box vans, communcating via mobiles for the location to try to outwit the law, from what I recall, spent most of them shitfaced on somethiong or other lol.

Thought you might find it interesting.....Hope your all alright takecare my cyber family HUGS to you all xoxoxoxo

Hey peeps,

Can I just apologise to everyone who has tried and failed to find me signed into yahoo messnger......For some reason, when its open yahoo on this old fing, everything slows right down or freezes altogether (reminds me of the depressed computer in Hitch Hikers guide...lol)! No way can I run it with msn either, or any other instant chat, so please be paitent, I am getting my super fast pc back this week, so I can run both yahoo, googletalk and msn together, so I will be back with lots of waffling for you whoo hoo!!!
I am really really sorry I didnt inform you boys and girls erlier, please forgive me. My memory has certainly deteriorated considerably since the diabetes was diagnosied, coupled with the menopause, I am in a bad way really, old age I guess, thats my excuse anyway!! I miss you all and will be back with you all soon HUGS xoxxoxo

hello few,

well I have had a pretty bad few months really, mostly down to my health...You recall I had that bad infection [IMG]http://i1107.photobucket.com/albums/h381/cosmickas/S1034042.jpg[/IMG] Also this...[IMG]http://i1107.photobucket.com/albums/h381/cosmickas/S1034046.jpg[/IMG] Thats what the nasty fing did to me. )if I have attached the pictures correctly this time, such a dumbass)!! I never actually recovered from that and it would flaw up at odd times, in fact last week, the whole of my lower jaw/face had swollen, Then I found out I had undiagnoised deibetes and I have really suffered with all of the associated symtoms, very unpleasnat and I can totally empathize with anyone who has this dibilitating illness. Then for some reason I started to have panic attacks, emmensley powerful ones, I dont like to take time off work, but I have had to, plus I have a few things on my mind too, I just had to keep reassuring myself I was safe, funny thing is the only thing you want to do is be with someone, to tell them how you feel, but then again, I do what I am good at and internalize it all in the hope it will all go away!!
I am feeling alot happier with mysekl and manageing to live with this condition, I think that my past life using that evil drug had kinda postponed all this to a certain degree, so once my body was not flooded with Morphine (which is what the Brain converts the Heroin into) it all hit me at once,made me extremely withdrawn and very unsure of my future....
I did reacha poin where I thought that maybe my time was up with regards bragirl and felt the site had given me as much as it can, but recently, I have beome so azware that I owe this site so much and the people I have met and lost.....they are all important and each and everyone of them has helped me transform from a lost out of control heroin addict, to someone who now walks with her head held high..So you guys and you all know who you are, I want to thank you so much for being there for me, through the ups and the dcowns. but also for NN for giving me a platform to put me on the right path, I owe so may so much and I owe my mister bed head my life..But hesmoved on, se la vie and good luck to him. Hope I can meet someone soon too....)))

Waffled far too much and never read back what I have written....Just hit send!! I have deep afection for a very number of you so thank you all for being my friend HUGS to each and everyone of you xoxxoxoxoxo

[url]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-neqv-WHB8[/url] Planet Kas ))

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