yesterday i felt like a granny, today i feel really young.

i actually visited my gran today and there we had this weird conversation. it was so unreal i think you guys might have fun reading it... it is as close as i remember it.

Gran: Your mom told me you got yourself a new computer.
Me: Yes, I did.
Gran: But the other one, it was just a couple of years old, wasn't it?
Me: It was four and it did not work any more. (as if that would explain it)
Gran: Four? That's not old! You just wasted money!!
Me: It was four, which is pretty old for a computer and it DID NOT WORK ANY MORE!!
Gran: My stove too has a digital clock. It's ten now. Still works perfectly. (mental "???"
Me: That's a stove. That is something completely different!!!
Gran: But it has a digital clock.
Me: That does not make it a computer!
Gran: Just two years ago, something was broken. A guy came and fixed it. It cost me €30. How much did your new computer cost?
Me: That's not the same!!
Gran: How much?
Me: Quite a bit more.
Gran: And it's the same thing you had. A computer.
Me: It's not the same thing.
Gran: Sure is. Couldn't you have gotten it fixed?
Me: Don't know, even if...
Gran: You don't know? What do you mean? You didn't even look around to get if fixed? You just bought a new one?
Me: Any repair would have cost way more than it was worth.
Gran: Bullocks. The repair couldn't possible cost more than a new one.
Me: I did not say it would cost more than a new one. It costs more than the old one was worth. And this one is much better.
Gran: Much better? How?
Me: Well, it is faster, up to date...
Gran: So you are going to keep it?
Me: (confused) Sure. I bought it.
Gran: And you are not going to replace it an a couple of years, just because it is broken, right?
Me: I just told you a computer that is a couple of years old is OLD! Technology changes fast.
Gran: Whatever. Here, I give you €20. You can't afford big spendings like that.

Then I changed the topic because I did not really want to go into detail about how many 20s you need to get a laptop.

So now you know why i feel young today.

great... my new laptop makes me feel old. expecially nn does. when i go into the forums i can hardly read a thing! i enlarged the graphics, but when reaching the point of being easily readable i feel like a granny because the letters are really pretty huge by then.

so what is the alternative? my glasses. and while i know i look good when they are on, i do not like them too much. and they always seem to produce stuff that sticks on them. i put them in their little home in perfect condition. just out of the tub so to say. i take them out a day later and they look like i polished them with hand lotion. do they have a life of their own? do they go out and sit on other peoples noses when i am not looking?

questions, questions, question.



if you wonder why and how i come up with that, it's easy. i am moving back into my place (as in where i live when i study) and there is a lot of packing to do. even more than there was when i got all the stuff to my parents' (my place was rented out during summer, not too clever to leave more than the essentials there). but i have been a happy spender during summer (things like a laser printer, getting the expensive ink thingys every month got on my nerves and did not leave a good impression on my account) and now there are plenty of bags, boxes and god knows what else around me. some of them already full... some not so. and what does a good, pervert woman do when she needs a rest? RIGHT!! check with nn. so here i am, thinking about the stuff i still have to get down to my car while i make funny moves with my eyes because i cant see a thing. the pleasures about getting older ... maybe i should check with my gran to see what else is to come lol.

end of rant... back to perving

(if you had troubles understanding what i said, it probably is my fault not yours... the whole blog does not make a whole lot of sense)

say hi to my new laptop!!

[img]http://www.weltbild.ch/media/ab/2/013/775/013.775.622.jpg[/img]

[img]http://www.weltbild.ch/media/sb/1/013/584/013.584.374.jpg[/img]

my old one died (completely, absolutely dead. not even safe mode works any more) a couple of days ago and since uni starts again in very few days getting a new one was rather urgent.

it was more expenive than i hoped it would be, but still affordable. now the only thing i have to get used to is vista. so far it works out well between the two of us, but we will see. whats on my schedule now? thats easy. getting all the programs, bookmarks... from my old one on that one. and i have to remember all my passwords and usernames. i really should write a list... you know, with pen and paper.

I think someone has to explain the theory behind holidays to me again. Somehow I don't manage to keep my feet still for a bit.

When I came back I paid tribute to my jet lag and slept in. But ever since, what do I do? I teach more private lessons than ever. I even re-write friggin exercises because I know that my students will have trouble understanding them otherwise (don't worry, i do cite correctly). I tell myself I do it for the money. But then again, my account is healthier than it ever was (I still have to figure out the laptop problem, but a really good offer has just came up, i might just take it) and with non-excessive spending and a normal amount of private lessons during the year I will be just fine. So why do I do it? I have no idea. But somehow my own work mania gets on my nerves (and that is not because I don't have much time to study for my left over finals).
I do have a suspicion though. Mr. Benefits has been pretty hard to reach and impossible to meet up with (a lllllooooonnnnnnggggg and not positive story) and it seems as if I am not used to having free time any more and that is why i cover myself in work. Or I just don't want to think about the non-positive side of the story.
Whatever it is: does anyone know a good and low budget shrink?????

today is the yearly "celebrate the alcohol-day" for me. it does not look as bad as it was last year, but we will see where it ends got the juice and the bacardi in front of me at the moment and i already went through a nice part of it.

tomorrow is going to be a slow day, which is why i chose today to be the celebration day.

i also found out that i am going to give quite a lot of private lessons on monday and tuesday (which is good, although my account is nice and quite a bit (for me) positive at the moment, i know that it is going to be a long year before anything really big will come up again, so i am really happy about any chance i get to earn some money, 'specially since i just was shoe-shopping )

if i write things you cant understand, blame it on the bacardi. if you can understand, you either got your own bottle of bacardi in front of you or you should

cheers!!

oh boy... i got a lazy week and since i do not want to spend it reading (if i do i run out of books early) i watch tv in the evenings. but: the programm sucks!! on this weekend there were mostly made-for-tv-catastrophy-movies on. i could have watched tsunamis being produced by some evil-guy's bombs, a dam break and flood cities and last but not least the moon breaking apart and falling onto the earth (jep, that one sounded particularly stupid). i mean, who comes up with that stuff and what kind of drugs do they take? second: do i need the same kind of drugs to enjoy the movie and if yes, why don't i get them with my tv-guide?

that means: it was internet and books for me this weekend. and petting the dog for hours. not the worst programm ever but it could be improved. any volunteers?

this blog might not be the right thing to read if you tend to freak out at household accidents. if you read further (esp. the 4th paragraph after this one, the one that starts with: after i get downstairs...) it is not my fault. consider yourself warned. if you still want to read the great things my mind spills you might want to skip that particular paragraph.




basic information to understand: at the moment i am at my parent's house. just back from 7 weeks of working they want me around them for a bit. my brother is here as well, for a couple of days.


the evening started off well... with quite a bit of home made sangria (by me) and i then went up to my room to perv and more.

suddenly my mum comes into my room without knocking (something she never does) and tells me to come downstairs right away. i have to drive my brother to the ER. Without further notice she is out again and i am left a bit confused. (nothing to do with the alcohol. since it is not "that day of the year" i drank very little and was fit to drive, something at least the others could not do any more (legaly))

so i get downstairs and my brother tells me that the nail of his big toe got caught in the guide rail of the shower doors and that he stumbled and ripped it right off. (euwww... i know)

so i put him into my car and got to the hospital after a rather short time. not too fast, but well, the streets were empty... a girl has to make the best of a trip like that.

big surprise. the ER was actually empty! no other patients (ok, there was not too much staff either, but we did not need that many of them) and we were in and out within something like 40 minutes. my brother with a big bandage on his foot and without any happy-pills (which at that moment seemed to bother him the most), me happy that everything would eventually become normal again and that we did not have to spend the night waiting.

now to the nice part. i was supposed to talk to mr. benefits just shortly before i was told to drive to the ER. so i sent him a text telling him what happened and that i would not be able to make it. he answered in the nicest possible way (he always knows what a girl wants to hear in such a situation) and told me not to worry.

so when i got back i assumed he had gone to bed. but well, i saw that his messenger-away-message said that i should text him, no matter what time. not feeling too good about texting him at 1am, but knowing that he would worry otherwise i sent him what i knew and wished him a good night.
only seconds later my phone rang. it was him. we talked for hours (something we somehow could not arrange since i got back, more than short calls were not possible due to his stressy time at work at the moment). we started off at A and ended the call somewhere around W when both batteries on our mobiles were about to die. i had great conversations with him in the past. but since this has been a stressful night i enjoyed talking to him so much. we were able to catch up a bit, still got plenty of that to do, but it is a beginning, and just talk. about everything. about nothing.

so now, although the night started off really badly i have a big smile on my face, the kind usually only a long night of sex can put on a girls face.

good night to all of you out there. i wish you all have a reason to smile.

xxx

i was just surfing around while waiting for a certain thread to implode and i decided to take part in a survey. and there is one question in it i can not answer. here is the question and the possible answers:

When is a companion relationship really over?
a) At death
b) At the signature of divorce
c) When one says "It's over"
d) When both agree
e) When there is abuse

For me e) is a sure reason. but does that mean if there is no abuse the relationship is never over? I can only choose one answer, and i know, it is only a survey, but this for sure got me thinking.

... for abandoning him.

ever since i came back my laptop has more "character" (means: he does what he wants, not what i tell him to do) than ever. he opens and closes programms whenever he feels like it, he only allows me to use a limited amount of letters all the time (the x is on of the hardest, i sometimes have to hit that key close to 20 times to get one)... even my "scaring technique" (=online search for a new laptop) does not seem to frighten him any more. neither does the fact that i just fell in love with one of them and i am seriously thinking about buying it.

if my laptop is pissed at me because i left him alone for seven weeks, shouldn't he be extra friendly to me now, otherwise i might leave him again?
maybe he is just confused with all the tabs i have open. pics of nude people, mp3 players, laser printers, external hard disks, laptops. yes, some major money spending is about to come.
i do not even own a mp3 player yet, but i think i finally gave in. and my discman is broken. sooner or later i need to get one, and i should be able to afford it at the moment.
laser printer is going to be a late birthday present. yes, not the most personal but i need one, so i am not going to say no.
external hard disk is not in question. there is pretty much no room left on the one i have and the bit i still have here on the laptop has to stay free to make sure it works at least a bit.
and then there is the laptop. the financial unstable thing. will i have enough money to buy it? i guess so. am i able to live on the money i earn throughout the year (because then none of the summer money will be left)? questionable.

decisions, decisions, decisions.



btw, i somewhere in my brain know that my computer not really has a personality and is not a real person. but if you knew him, you might share my opinion on sam.

First of all I would like to say
to bikerbonezuk for passing on my messages. Another thanks goes to those of you who actually reacted

I was not able to visit this site for the last 4 weeks since I was living with a VERY christian woman and to online I had to use her computer. Somehow I figured NN in the browser history would most likely result in me sleeping on the street so I kept distance. But now I am back and I will spend quite some free time here. (WOW! I have free time now! This has not happened to me in the last 7 weeks). After all I have to catch up with what happened on here. If you want to help me- feel free to PM me with whatever you think I should know. This also counts for Forum threads. Anything I have to read? Somehow I seriously doubt that I can catch up with 7 weeks of pics, blogs and forum… that means: help is appreciated.
Speaking of Forum: I really hope I won’t have to read any goodbyes!! Bonez once sent me a screen shot and there were no new goodbyes of people I know and I really hope it stayed that way. If not, then I have to get my whip out and visit whoever left at his/her home.

So what was going on in those last 4 weeks?
I will write whatever comes to my mind so I hope you are not too confused (or exhausted if the blog becomes too long) with what I write. I try to order it somehow, but I am not sure if I will succeed in doing so.

One thing one has to write about when in Cali is the heat. I think we had 106°F pretty much every day (who the hell builds a city in a desert?) and when that kind of weather happens to an Austrian girl pretty much anything can happen. Here I present: tan lines that will for sure leave justlooking123 screaming
looks fine, right?



well, not really


But what should I have done to not get them? Ok, the feet would have been rather easy to avoid (if the concrete would not have been that hot) but the rest? Run around naked? Like that is going to happen (with students around).

Usually my days in Cali started pretty early. Unless it is time for the finals at Uni I don’t even have to get up that early during the year. And if I do have to get up at that time everyone understands perfectly why I am grumpy in the morning. But there they wanted me to rise and shine and be full of good mood. I did not always succeed.

There was a lot of travelling involved in those 4 weeks (not only getting there and back home, which are both pretty much 24hrs pure travelling time) but also travelling through Cali. LA, San Francisco, the town I stayed in, Universal Studios, Beverly Hills, Venice, Santa Monica, Santa Barbara, Dodgers game, Disneyland… were the things we spent quite some time at. (San Francisco was a nice and cool break after the oven they call a city in which I lived. While all the others wore multiple layers of pullovers I was perfectly fine with a short sleeved shirt.)
While travelling around I spent a few nights in hotel rooms. I love hotel rooms. There are hardly ever any too embarrassing pieces of furniture or stuff around an even if there is, you can easily say “not mine- just a hotel”, which makes it damn perfect for a NN-photo shoot, right? I took some, and I promise to get them online as soon as I find the right cable to connect my cam to my computer (but with all that unpacking going on here, that might take a tiny little bit).
Hotel rooms, for me at least, do have some drawbacks though. Whenever I hit the sheets I feel the BIG urge to have someone next to me. Always someone sexual active. I do lust after men/women when in bed alone on a regular basis, but that can be handled. But as soon as I lay down in a hotel bed the feeling is overwhelming. I have no idea why. Sadly enough my need did not get fulfilled- at least not by someone other than me.
In those hotels I got the only real chance to watch some telly in those 7 weeks. And guess what I found on “prude-we-don’t-even-show-skin-in-our-shampoo-commercials America”? Commercials for Viagra. It is ok to promote Viagra but it is not ok to show a naked back during a shampoo commercial? Call me crazy but that makes no sense to me. But that was not the only thing I was surprised about. There is one clear reason why a commercial like that would never be shown in Austria: You need a prescription for Viagra. And whatever medicine you need a prescription for does not get promoted here. What good would it be? You can’t go into the nearest pharmacy to buy them anyway. But well, there is the saying about Rome and the Romans, right?

When I was not travelling California I was usually teaching. Oh boy. You have no idea how hard it is to motivate students to actually learn something during their holiday (or how hard it is to motivate yourself to do some lesson planning). But all together we talked about a nice share of subjects although I have to admit that I agreed to playing hangman more often than I would during school year.

The time difference between here and Cali are 9hrs. While I did not suffer from Jet Lag when I got there I am afraid it will hit me rather badly now. We will see, but at least here I can say: “Who cares?” and go to bed pretty much whatever time I want to… don’t you just love holidays? Kind of shitty was calling the office though. While it does not matter if I call Mr. Benefits at 11pm (Austria-time) it does matter when you try to reach an office. If you call them in the night (US-time) they are surprised because they did not expect you to call that early (and there is always the question “if you are still up now, how will your work be tomorrow??” in their head). If they call you in the morning (US-time) they are sometimes surprised that someone can sound that tired at 3pm (Austria-time =6am Cali-time). So you can’t really win, can you?

I had a lot of fun in the States, but the things there are organised in a completely different way to what they are in the UK. I do not know if I get offered to go to the US again next year and at the moment I do not know if I would do it again. I will for sure do this job again next year. I will work my ass off again. But where? I don’t know. I will see in a few months when I have to apply for locations I guess.
Till then I have a bit more than 10 months of premium membership to enjoy and I will do my very best to start perving right away. I must make up for those almost 2 months in which I could hardly/not at all come online here.

What do I have planned for the next time? The annual celebration of alcohol (probably early in September) is not too far away any more (some might remember last years witches brew- if not, it can be reread in an earlier blog) but other than that there is NOTHING planned for the next two to three weeks!!! Wohoo!!! There will be a few finals which I postponed to late September, but at the moment, my mind is free of any too unpleasant dutys!

Off to perving now… till I fall asleep, lets see how much I can look at before that.

See you around. I will for sure be here for quite a bit now.