.....from the supermarket again.

What is "Extra virgin" olive oil???? I always thought that being a virgin was kinda in the same league as being pregnant, u either ARE or u AREN'T.

Is EXTRA virgin something like being SLIGHTLY pregnant????

I have irrefutable evidence that they are watching all of us!

The newsreaders on my TV give it away - they always finish up by saying "Thanks for watching, we'll see you again tomorrow".

THEY will see ME FFS!!!!

Beware! TV is evil!!! It's being used by THEM to spy on us!!!

Further to MDGuy's earlier blog, and in case anybody doesnt know what a "TimTam Slam" is:

[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_Tam_Slam[/url]

It's the ultimate in choccy pleasure!!!

Yep, eventful, that's been my life over the past few days.

First, the "International Banking System" managed to absorb a considerable amount of my hard earned money being sent from Australia to Thailand for services rendered. Lost!! Completely disappeared!! So the Company was good enough to send me the same amount again. Now this morning (3 weeks after it was sent), the original funds have miraculously appeared - in the wrong bank of course, but at least in the right country - nestled comfortably alongside the second transfer!!! So I now have twice as much as I should have! Oh well, it's better than not having it at all.

On another note, satin bedsheets should be either completely banned or sold with stirrups so I can get a grip! For the first time in many months, the missus decided to put the satin sheets on the bed yesterday. Slippery as they are, I decided to put one foot on the floor for "leverage" during last night's antics. Hmmm, I managed to fall off and pull a groin muscle! (No, not THAT groin muscle) Ouch!!! It was funny at the time, but I can hardly walk today.

After the conversation we had in chat this morning, I thought some of u might find this amusing:


A limo driver is sent to pick up the Pope at the airport. After getting all of the Pope's luggage loaded into the limo, and He doesn't travel light, the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the kerb.

'Excuse me, Your Holiness,' says the driver, 'Would you please take your seat so we can leave?'

'Well, to tell you the truth,' says the Pope, 'they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I'd really like to drive today.'

'I'm sorry but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! And what if something should happen?' protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning.

'There might be something extra in it for you,' says the Pope.

Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.

'Please slow down, Your Holiness!!!' pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens. 'Oh, dear God, I'm gonna lose my licence,' moans the driver.

The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio.

'I need to talk to the Chief,' he says to the dispatcher.

The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going a hundred and five.

'So bust him,' says the Chief.

'I don't think we want to do that - he's really important,' said the cop.

The Chief exclaimed, 'All the more reason!'

'No, I mean really important,' said the cop.

The Chief then asked, 'Who have you got there, the Mayor?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

Chief: 'Governor?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

'Well,' said the Chief, 'Who is it?'

Cop: 'I think it's God!'

Chief: 'What makes you think it's God?'

Cop: 'He's got the f**ing Pope as a chauffeur!'

Mmmm, two more yummy varieties of TimTams I just found at my supermarket. I buy em for the kids - honest I do!! I really do!!

Hmmm, had to waste valuable NN perving time rescuing the silly kitten from the tree this morning. Anybody suggest suitable captions for these??








Ooooh, I'm on top of Benjie!! )

I do a great imitation of a dog barking, a cat meowing and even a cow mooing!! (Yeah, I'm an animal lover)

The big question is where should I put these amazing talents on my Resume - under "Qualifications" or "Other Interests"??

What is it that 90% of people in my local supermarket don't understand about the sign which says "10 items or less" over one of the checkouts FFS??? And the "checkout chicks" there obviously can't count either.

The latest additions to the family