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I am a walking contradiction skirting jurisdictions while self-implementing restrictions. I am a melancholy free spirit afraid sometimes to sing my own lyrics. I am child with old eyes and past lives striving to do more than survive. I am a silly, nostalgic, horny, romantic with naive antics. I am not afraid to break the rules of being cool or getting schooled. I am the color of earth, often misunderstood since birth. A chain smoker and late night toker, an ego stroker, sensitive joker and occasional chicken choker. I am as deep as you will allow yourself to wade in. I am my mother's creation, my father determination, the wages of so called sin and the scars left after being stabbed in the back or forgotten by a friend. I am the shy shiver of of an endless giver whose cheeks are moist and quiver from tears shed alone. I am heavy in heart and weight but free of prejudice and hate. I am a meandering soul searching to become whole while traveling in a caterpillar-like form. Not seeking shelter with the norm but weathering the storms that will come and pass with the perfectly imperfect fumbling we call existence. shaking off the shackles of pretense while understanding experience is neither good nor bad, more or less until the next time you can put it to its test. And if it is in the case to give someone an open hand I willing give it until my time's last grain of sand rests upon the cosmic strand. Our reality is within our hands
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| Sunday, December 16, 2007, 10:54:21 AM- rattlings of an insomniac in love | ||
Something beyond my complete comprehension, Something I have sought to give a definition, To break it down, so I it doesn't confound, Doesn't turn my knees to jelly when you come around, And when you come close to give me a hug and kiss, My eyes roll up as I ascend into bliss, Loving the smell of you after working, no cologne, Feel safe in the embrace of your arms your athletic tone, Just sitting beside you, feel the warmth of your being, IN my mind fleeing with you is all I'm seeing, I try to keep my polite face, keep my composure, Fearing what you will think or do with my heart's exposure, Praying you know I want to be nothing more or less, Than a friend that you can count among things you feel blessed | ||
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| Sunday, December 16, 2007, 9:39:18 AM- Ease | ||
I fought it, but caught it, You slid inside me with ease, Like rain drops from up top, Soothing, so subtly divine, You're my fave, make me want to misbehave, But I will not rush in, Happy to langush with a breathing wish, In the company of a friend, There is no mystery we have chemistry, We leave the rules and prejudices behind, Old souls reunited, attraction unspoken but cited, Existing and loving, with ease | ||
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| Sunday, December 16, 2007, 9:13:28 AM- hmmm ...a name? | ||||||
When you're near, All I can hear, Is my heart beat like a drum strong and clear, The wind whispers to me, let it be, Like the mountains, seas, trees birds and bees, Don't let any other notion about your emotion, Cause your soul a commotion, Even with this said, in my head, Some portion was unhappily wed, To push you away, never to say, How you are a rainbow in a world so gray, I thougt at first my feelings were a curse, All I wanted was for them to quickly disperse, Stopped looking for reasons, stopped calling this treason, Stopped saying this feeling was just a season, All the things to our friendship you bring, Are more than enough reasons to make my heart sing, Maybe what is mentally debated will never be consummated, But I know they will no longer be hated or deprecated. | ||||||
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| Wednesday, December 12, 2007, 11:26:05 AM- | ||||||
I finally decided on a name for my last poem. Scent of A Hint: THis could Be if Only You Knew. Yes the name is long as hell but I just couldn't say one of the great offerings put into comments in my last blog was above all the others. In other news a while back I mentioned my halloween pics. Trying to get them into my blog has been annoying the hell out of me. So if you are premium and would like to see some of the pics, let me know and I will pm them to you. If you are not premiu and a good friend, let me know and I will make other arrangments. Take care my friends. Much love!! | ||||||
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| Tuesday, December 11, 2007, 3:43:28 AM- Make the Call | ||||||
Wow all really great choices my friends, thank you ladies and gents! I think "This Could Be if You Knew" or "Scent of A Hint" are the best. Combinations of Tight's and locksley's, then a composite of Emdee's and Nice B's suggested titles. Let me know what you all think of those two choices. I feel like writing more! Sometimes I wish I could telepathically or just physically ouch someone so they could feel what I feel when I write. You all may not know it, but when my hand touches the computer or paper, I feel you special there as well. It isn't just about what my subject is, it is about my universd. And you all are stars in my Universe! I often write directly here into this blog, not sure what will come out. It's just a few lines, or a phrase, and then it just grows once planted here. I apologize for the typos etc. that often occur whne I do write here first thing before putting it to Microsoft word, but that's how it normaly starts, here, with you. Much love and respect my friends. | ||||||
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| Monday, December 10, 2007, 8:20:47 AM- New and doesn't have a title and would welcome suggestions :) | ||||||
I went out and bought some cologne, Even though some I already own, Brushed my teeth twice, Put on an extra coat of old Spice, Color coordinated my clothes, Did every primp beside powdering my nose, I practiced what speaking voice to use, Even what face I thought you couldn't refuse, Now there is the long ride over to your place, My chaotic thoughts run a ragged race, Thinking bout all the hints I have left at your feet, The only thing left is be eye to eye with you and speak, What I've held in my heart since that long ago day, Destiny in my eyes let us cross ways, Yes it is cold outside, the leaves are shivering, But its not the temperature making my lips quiver, MY hands tremble so much I stuff them in my pockets, My body abuzz as if I had just touched a light socket, Got out closed the car door, looked up into the sky, Praying for a fortuitous sign to breeze by, The sky was an non-aiding source, covered in gray, Once again with each step I went over what I wanted to say, No I wasn't going to play it off as a physical thing, Devalue you and myself, by offering some fleeting playing, I just had to come clean, for better or worse, Let you know, hope you felt this wasn't a curse, Genuine feelings, devotion and adoration, To be received hopefully with a celebration, One way or another, to be or not in our stars, I felt too much, and come too far, To change my message, or speechlessly return to the car, As my hand grabbed the doorknob I was ready say that you are, My friend, my hope, my fantasy everything for which I dreamed, And without a mirror I know my eyes got misty and gleamed, For better or worse, come what may, I would let you know how I felt about you this day. | ||||||
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| Sunday, December 9, 2007, 8:37:51 AM- Boy From Venus | ||||||
Hiding behind smoky veils, Hoping you can’t tell, That I’m adoring you from a afar, Wishing upon a star, To shed light into this matter, While butterfly wings continue to batter, My insides, close enough to touch, Second guessing what is too much, Wanting you to know I could never do you harm, I am simply a guileless soul mesmerized by your charms, Vulnerable but vainly keeping up my guard, When innocent touches makes it so hard, Beating my fist and head against a wall, Trying to fight back my emotion's call, Thinking less of myself and wanting to give you everything great or small, What does a boy from Venus have to offer after all, Dreaming I could wrap myself within words, That my sincerity could be unquestionably heard, That I could be seen as beautiful by you, That as I see your soul you could see mine too, See past my scars and short fallings, Not see my feelings as ridiculous and appalling, I find myself drinking to ease my tension, And find I'm losing the retention, To be the good friend, stay within the lines, Play off all of my subconscious wanton signs, You affect in so many ways, can you realize, How you are seen in a boy from Venus' eyes. | ||||||
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| Wednesday, December 5, 2007, 3:00:44 AM- Just a blog blurb | ||||||
Sometimes you can have just a ho hum day, your plans get out of line a bit. And then you realize it's cool. Then you can have days where it just get's better, and it's from something so simple we often take it for granted. I normally would be working around this time and got to stop into chat around 5ish since I was off work. I caught up and chatted with some great people, ones I definitely call friends. Thank you for making my day a brilliant one! With much love a starr reborn aka Mike | ||||||
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| Tuesday, December 4, 2007, 11:17:53 PM- Just a blog blurb | ||||||
Sometimes you can have just a ho hum day, your plans get out of line a bit. And then you realize it's cool. Then you can have days where it just get's better, and it's from something so simple we often take it for granted. I normally would be working around this time and got to stop into chat around 5ish since I was off work. I caught up and chatted with some great people, ones I definitely call friends. Thank you for making my day a brilliant one! With much love a starr reborn aka Mike | ||||||
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| Tuesday, December 4, 2007, 9:33:21 PM- Spontaneously Inspired by DepotGuy (I hope he reads this and names it) | ||||||
I've walked around for so long with my head down, My demeanor and inner self pushed way down, Within resides a universe of colors and hues, Everything from gold, to red, purple green and blues, There is a well of sounds that whispers and swells, There are horns, voices, drums and bells, There is a child kind, giving and sometimes wild, Who is passionate but whose temperament is gentle and mild, I was physically born a man but I think few really understand, I am a thought, a feeling, a force beyond a life span, Cooped up too long by others expectation and my perceived imperfections, Longing to be in someway someone's selection, For too many days I was content to be a should, would or could, Existing within another's framework of what is good, I am love, I am joy, I am silliness and depth, I am creation and soul when nothing is left, With only words and breath, in reality, I will continue to speak of love and possibility. I will go past barriers and bonds, Knowing we all are a part of existence in one great big pond. | ||||||
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