A woman takes a lover while her husband is at work.

She doesn't know that her 9 year old in is hiding in the closet.

The husband comes by at lunchtime,

so the woman puts the lover in the same closet as her son.

The boy says "it's dark in here".

The lover says "it sure is".

The boy says

"I've got a baseball".

The lover says "that's nice".

The boy asks "want to buy it?"

The lover asks "how much?"

The boy says "$250.00".

The lover says "that's too much."

The boy says "I need to tell my dad something."

The lover says "o.k., I'll buy it."

A week later the husband comes home at lunch.

The woman again puts the lover in the same closet with her son.

"It's dark in here."

The lover says "yes, it is."

The boys says "I have a baseball glove."

The lover asks "how much?"

The boys says "$750.00"

The lover says "That's too much!"

The boy says "I need to tell my dad something."

The lover quickly says "all right, I'll buy it."

A couple of weeks later, the dad asks if the boy would like to go outside and toss the ball around.

The boy tells him he can't because he sold the ball and his glove.

"How much did you sell them for?" the dad asks.

"$1,000.00, the boy replies.

The father scolds him for selling them to a friend for so much

and takes him to church to confess to the priest.

Once in the confessional,

the boy says "It sure is dark in here."

The priest replies

"Don't start that shit again!"

~

Getting offended by something posted on the internet

is like choosing to step in dog shit

instead of walking around it.

~

If we removed all the margarine from the earth,

the world would be a butter place.

~

This Christmas season,

what better gift could you receive from anyone

than to have a hacker with a heart of gold

erase all of your debt?

~

Fascinating -

unless you're a cynic.

~

The Indianapolis Colts of the NFL have all THREE of their quarterbacks out due to injuries.

They have signed 45 year old Phillip Rivers

(who has not played since he retired 5 years ago).

Desperate times call for desperate measures,

it appears.

~

I've got a hankerin' for some peanut butter and maple syrup.

Mix 'em in a bowl and eat with white bread.

Yummy!

~

A lazy meal last night:

Campbell's chunky soup.

It's the choice that was odd...

Chili dogs with pasta.

It actually tasted pretty good.

~

That's what I'll be eating while vegging out watching (American) football today.

~

Genesis 3:19 -

"dust you are and to dust you will return."

That's why I've quit dusting...

I'm afraid I might accidentally inhale an old friend.

~