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I'm thankful to be alive and I know I've got genuine friendships here and in person with members whom I adore for WHO they are. I am alive. My libido doesn't matter all that much these days. I was a virgin bride. A lil Goody-goody two shoes. I didn't know that a high libido wasn't normal. Now, I'm just trying to just enjoy simply being alive.... Life is a challenge of resilience. plain n simple. You either survive, or you learn to see the joy in every tiny moment. rain drops spattering on your face. The welcoming morning calls of wild mourning doves and quail. I wish y'all joy and safety in your lives
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| Saturday, December 13, 2014, 2:44:14 AM- | ||||||
decided it's time to go to a concert for my friend, Spencer and his band... up at Liquid Joe's. I need some hugs, and I know I'll get a few from him... all the other guys from local bands I know, are up in Ogden at the opening concert for the Royal BLISSmas, road trip around area... they start there, then will be in Evanston, WY, then, a few other places... they'll be here, at The Royal, next Friday, and I'll be sure to be at that concert. I miss these bands, and the guys, a lot... I miss feeling noticed by rock stars that I actually KNOW friends.... and I miss well, just hugs in general, as well as their music live. Time for my pain meds for my back, and cold meds for the rest of me... then out the door to enjoy some of Spencer's new music, and a glass of water, to nurse all night long. | ||||||
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| Friday, December 12, 2014, 3:00:10 AM- | ||||||
hmm adding to that last entry.... look at the scenery... oh, the WATER! The glorious greens and life in that scenery... and, the lovely message of the song... how would it be, to have someone like that in each of our lives... believing, willing following, leading... how would it feel to KNOW that? looking at clasped hands. time to take my daughter to her boyfriend's home. She's staying there, tonight.. and I'll work a little more on the drawings I'm creating... and get some much needed rest, I'm hoping. Now, back to dreaming... of water, clear, glittering, spraying as it cascades over rocks and mosses.... delight energy, life. | ||||||
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| Friday, December 12, 2014, 2:51:31 AM- | ||
trying to find upliftment in any way and place that I can... The new aspect of work is kind of cool... potentially it's very exciting. No clue yet... so many cool feeling projects tanked or turned out to ruin things for the unit, not raise us to the top like the cream of the group we knew ourselves to be.... so many have walked because of that... I miss a lot of past team mates... and, oddly... I've seen many return to this place... though, they returned to positions of leadership, not where they'd been before. *sigh* Here is a song I've been listening to a lot on the dark drive to work... picture me behind the wheel... exhausted, even though I'd just awakened and showered, trying to rinse the sleep from my eyes and scent of loss from my skin. I do enjoy this song. | ||
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| Thursday, December 11, 2014, 3:35:40 AM- | ||
okay.. love Daniel Powter... so when I heard his voice, I had to look at the vid.. snickering.. too funny. something upbeat.. | ||
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| Thursday, December 11, 2014, 2:21:49 AM- | ||||||
spider bites are getting ugly and itchy again... *sigh* I don't think my Christmas Undies are going to be seen by anyone other than myself and well... anyone in my home when I get naked... I just kind of strip where and when I feel like it... my poor poor daughter had to grow up with a nudist mom. She just says, "Mom... it's a good thing you didn't have any sons." *shrugs* I was looking forward to setting up the camera and diving onto my bed like I used to do it. But who would want to see a bruised up cellulite version of me, in new holiday panties? | ||||||
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| Wednesday, December 10, 2014, 2:17:05 AM- | ||||||
missed the deadline... that's okay. I'll just ask newromance for help when or if I want to post something new. I'm tired... worked this weekend, to get overtime hours. change of shifts at work while in training means I need to go to bed much earlier if I want sleep... and then, it'll be time soon, to get up, go to work and focus on the new project. I HOPE more than ANYTHING that it'll help make things better for me.... but, who knows? It's a distraction from things for a while. A different way of doing the job. A new skill set, to add to the resume. Night. | ||||||
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| Sunday, December 7, 2014, 4:33:47 AM- | ||||||
today's the last day I have of premium... no clue what to use the last few moments on... so... maybe nothing? then again maybe something... like photos of the rest of my decorations for this Christmas season... and, maybe baby birds, in my daughter's hand... the ideas are limited to my time, not to much anything else. I'm tired... and, right now, I'm not sure how long I'll have my daughter living with me... I can't stand her manipulation, passive aggressive behavior, her twisted and self centered attitude. And her determination to destroy any time I spend with other people and, sadly even with her... I'm angry with her, and with me... for allowing her to rule over me for far far too long. I'm sicked by who she's become... too much rage, jealousy and reaction... It's GOT to end. | ||||||
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| Saturday, December 6, 2014, 6:13:10 AM- | ||||||
for some reason I feel like using somebody tonight.. *sigh* | ||||||
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| Saturday, December 6, 2014, 2:45:03 AM- | ||||||
more good and delicious songs to enjoy | ||||||
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| Thursday, December 4, 2014, 6:49:39 AM- | ||||||
music that's just plain hotza steamy... lusty, sexual... nice and naughty... *sigh* | ||||||
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