Today I honor those who died for our country.

May you and your families know peace.

~

I matched 3 numbers on Saturday night's Lotto drawing.

Please give me some privacy while I figure out how to spend this huge amount of money I will be receiving.

Thank you.

~

I dreamed last night that video stores were open again, but it was illegal to own a VCR.

I still have 2 vcrs and a tv that has a built in vcr player.

Why?

Because every once in a while I run into an old friend who has VHS tapes, but no player.

Yes, I hang on to things too long.

But a good scout is always prepared and I think of my friends happiness.

~

Swing, you hep cats!


Jumpin' jive.

While waiting at a traffic light, I noticed the bumper sticker on the car in front of me.

It read:

'I am a veterinarian, therefore I drive like an animal'.

Suddenly,

I realized how many proctologists are on the road.

~

I took a nice long walk around my neighborhood this morning.

Utility work is being done everywhere.

I felt like, with all of the deep holes and dirt piled high,

that I was walking through the aftermath of a bombing.

Detours everywhere I looked.

Now I wonder how/where people park when they get home from work.

~

I dreamed I was in a temp agency, applying for a job.

The counselor interviewing me asked me if I would care to try babysitting.

"Sure", I said. "I'll give it a go".

She said "That's great!"

"Would you prefer mobster or monster?"

Luckily, I woke up.

~

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

~ Mark Twain

Any time I startle someone and they say:

"You scared me half to death"

I tell them I'll come back and finish the job.

I hate to leave things half done.

I have always been amused at 'experts' opinions on how much sleep we need at certain ages.

When I was a kid, I only got 8 to 10 hours sleep a night when I was sick.

My dad had a bluegrass band and practiced 2 or 3 times a week at our house, so I couldn't go to bed before they left around 10pm.

I did get to watch the Twilight Zone and Alfred Hitchcock Presents, though. Excellent fodder for my childhood dreams.

In high school I was always on the go -

work, concerts and ballgames.

I was a teenager. I slept when I had to sleep.

In my 20s and 30s, I usually slept about 4 hrs. a night in the summer and maybe 6 in the winter.

Work, chasing girls and ballgames were the culprits.

Middle age caught me up in a routine of working... a lot.

I might have missed 3 or 4 days in 25 years at the same job.

Getting out of my ex-wife's debt she left me and saving for retirement took up most of my time.

6 hrs. sleep a night if I were lucky.

Now I'm retired.

I have as much time to sleep as I'd like if I so choose.

Instead I have busied myself with projects, reading and watching ballgames or movies.

Once a week I try to have myself a 'lie-in', but instead of sleeping I find myself just l resting, not actually sleeping.

The good news is I am now relaxed, healthy and happy.

Sometimes,

sleep IS over-rated.

~